Saturday, January 21, 2017

Uncertainty & the Power of Stillness

I sit on the floor in the middle of the crowded little room. Candle light, harmonium, guitar, chanting--Ganesha, Ram Sita, Hare Krishna, Om Namah Shivaya. Memories of India trickle in. Stillness. Gurmukh's voice echos somewhere in the back of my mind, "Don't get caught in the washing machine." And all else washes away.


I blink. I'm sitting on another floor in a large circle. We all hold hands and squeeze. I open my eyes and look to my left, and there she is, in person. I know far more about her than most people I've never met, and she has no idea who I am. We eat fruit and talk about travel and life. Our energies drawn together here in Chiang Mai, Thailand on the floor of a dance mandala class. A scenario I don't think I could have made up if I tried.

I blink. Another night, another hardwood floor under me, this time for my first Tarot reading of 2017. A handful of the same cards appeared as my last reading and in many of the same positions. A reminder, a reinforcement of who I am and my direction--because what are the odds, really? Because that's how it works.

Practice noninterference was Gabby's lesson this week: "There is a time to slow down, to surrender, to trust, to rely on the Universe....Be receptive to the guidance that comes and be at peace. Create the connection, stand back, watch miracles unfold."


Uncertainty can be an adventure or it can cause suffering. Those last couple years I was in Santa Cruz I lived in an uncertain world that left me sleep deprived and anxious all the time. I needed certain outcomes and not knowing left me in a constant state of suffering.

In 2016, I stepped into another kind of uncertain world all together, and because I put no expectations on it, it was the best year. It was magical in ways I couldn't have possibly planned. This year is full of even more uncertainty.

It all comes down to one question: do I want a year of suffering or another year of magic? I think the answer is obvious, but of course, it's not as easy as it sounds. It takes discipline and practice to slow down and listen.


It's in those moments I've slowed down and stood in the middle of all the chaos and uncertainty that these synchronicities come through, these messages, the magic. Like all the times before on this journey, I'm reminded that in order to move forward, I need to be still. At the heart of all uncertainty lies an opportunity to turn inward, to trust, to listen to the calmest voice amidst the whirring.


How do you deal with uncertainty? Do you have a tendency to turn it into suffering or magic? Tell me your stories!

**By the way, if you're curious about the girl from the class I knew so much about, she writes one of my favorite blogs out there. I've been following her inspirational journey for well over two years. I discovered her blog right around the time I started hardcore research for my own travels. And just by chance (or not), we happen to both be in Chiang Mai and ended up sitting next to each other in a class at a yoga studio. Check out her blog: This American Girl

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