In four weeks time, my job here in Chiang Mai will come to an end. In seven weeks time, I will be off on another adventure of re-establishing my life as a writer and a collector of stories and visions. Curiosity has gotten me this far. Let's see where it takes me now.
I have tried on this life as a teacher at an elementary school here in Chiang Mai, and after a year and a half, it's time to go in a new direction. I can't express how much I have learned from this experience--the people I've worked with and the kids I've taught. They have all brought a value into my life that cannot be replaced, that I could not have discovered in any other way.
At the end of each day, I sit with myself and my feelings, and I ask: do I feel good about what I am doing? Are my core values being met? Is my inner world expanding? And as this school year has worn on, the answers to these questions have been a resounding no. I can no longer sink back and disappear into a system I don't align with, that doesn't bring out the best in me. I can no longer deny myself the freedom and serenity I can find by moving in a different direction.
I plan to return to Chiang Mai after burning season where I will spend the summer continuing to grow as a writer, a yoga instructor, and Tarot reader. I will revisit practices that I've abandoned since falling into my ever too busy life here in Chiang Mai.
Above all, this feels right. Not questioning this intuitive knowing that I need to step toward expansion. Of my options at this point, this is the one that lights me up, this is the one that I can wholeheartedly embrace and say, this is me.
At the end of each day, do you check in with yourself and ask how you feel? Do you ask if your core values are being met or in what ways your inner world is expanding? Experiment with me! Start checking in with yourself at the end of each day and let me know what you learn.
I have tried on this life as a teacher at an elementary school here in Chiang Mai, and after a year and a half, it's time to go in a new direction. I can't express how much I have learned from this experience--the people I've worked with and the kids I've taught. They have all brought a value into my life that cannot be replaced, that I could not have discovered in any other way.
At the end of each day, I sit with myself and my feelings, and I ask: do I feel good about what I am doing? Are my core values being met? Is my inner world expanding? And as this school year has worn on, the answers to these questions have been a resounding no. I can no longer sink back and disappear into a system I don't align with, that doesn't bring out the best in me. I can no longer deny myself the freedom and serenity I can find by moving in a different direction.
I plan to return to Chiang Mai after burning season where I will spend the summer continuing to grow as a writer, a yoga instructor, and Tarot reader. I will revisit practices that I've abandoned since falling into my ever too busy life here in Chiang Mai.
Above all, this feels right. Not questioning this intuitive knowing that I need to step toward expansion. Of my options at this point, this is the one that lights me up, this is the one that I can wholeheartedly embrace and say, this is me.
At the end of each day, do you check in with yourself and ask how you feel? Do you ask if your core values are being met or in what ways your inner world is expanding? Experiment with me! Start checking in with yourself at the end of each day and let me know what you learn.
Sarah one your insightful emails could easily come to me each morning, were you a life coach in the past?
ReplyDeleteI have a similar situation here on a small island in Spain, where I teach English and have been teaching English for a few years in different countries as a means to travel and live abroad.
Yoga and everything under that tremendous word have captivated me for the last 3 years, and I've been to India twice to study, yet always returning to the safe and the known; teaching English.
Like you, i feel times are a'changin'. English doesn't light me up anymore, except when i discover discover class has been cancelled.
My thoughts, my plans, which will be manifested (positive affirmating here hhaha!) Are to finish the academic year in June, as per my contract. Spend a summer travelling the canary islands using workaway to put all my theory with Yoga into hands on practice (though i would like to start teaching classes and running workshops and healing classes much sooner- oh and a blog and YouTube channel... It's the Sacral dominant chakra within me..)
But this is a great little spot to come back to in September. I am currently between ideas to go back to the English school, to another academic year, as it is only 20 hours a week with extraordinary good pay. Allowing me to, when i wake up around 7am, have 8 full hours of time before even having to teach English for a few hours in the afternoon.
Still, my heart isn't really in it anymore. So I thought about dropping down my hours just to 10 hours a week. Perhaps I am struggling to close the door on this part of myself that has given me so much joy and life experience over the years. Teaching English to the children here, perhaps moreso in a village, really makes me part of the place. Part of that child's learning experience, and therefore life, and therefore almost part of the extended family.
Or perhaps it's more just my root chakra starting to lose it with worries and instabilities and insecurities - what if no-one likes my classes? What if I can't afford my rent? What if ..... for every creative, visionary idea I come up with, there's a nagging self-doubt attached to it.
But I am working with it, deeply but gently.
Wow! Thank you for being so open! I've never been a Life Coach, but I've read (books & blogs) and watched many videos from several inspiring coaches & teachers over the years. I still do!
DeleteStepping away from what feels safe is always scary even if what we walk away from is harmful to our well being. For me, it took A LOT of crazy (CRAZY) things to happen to finally wake me up to leave my life in California. I'm saving those stories for my memoir 😉
To be completely transparent, I do have a very part time online teaching gig that I will keep in order to (hopefully) sustain myself as I put my energy back into my writing and yoga 😃
What will come out of all of this? I have no idea yet, but part of it is continuing to follow my curiosity and what lights me up and see where it leads me next.